Questions to Ask When Selecting an Egg Donor
“You will likely need an egg donor.”
The time may come when you hear these fateful words from your fertility doctor. While this message may come as a shock during the early stages of fertility planning, take some time and let your mind wrap around the statement.
Your doctor is really saying, “We’re going to help you try to start a family; we just need to approach it from a different angle.”
While there is often hesitation around using another’s egg to bring a new life into the world, take the time to reflect and then, move on to exploring your options. Selecting an egg donor will be one of the most important decisions you’ll make. It can feel like an overwhelming process for couples, but there are some questions to ask that can clarify this important step.
Do I Want to Know the Donor?
Some couples feel an anonymous donor is the way to go, because there is no chance that the child will have any opportunity to create a relationship with someone who is, in actuality, part of your fertility process and not a friend or family member. Still others feel that a known egg donor is the best choice for the child, in this case, a family member or friend can be the egg donor. This is something that you will have to discuss with your partner to decide what’s best for your family.
Do I Have a Physical Appearance Preference?
There is no requirement that says your child has to look exactly like you and your partner. After all, even couples who conceive naturally may have children that may not necessarily be their “spitting image.” But a question that many couples ask is – what are the defining physical characteristics of my family members? If you all have brown hair and want a little uniformity, select a dark-haired individual. You can look at childhood photos of the donor to see how the individual physical attributes would translate to your child, too. If this isn’t a high priority, concentrate on other considerations during the selection process which may include education, nationality, age, etc.
Is the Donor Located Near Me?
Your fertility clinic will work with you to narrow down the field of eligible egg donor candidates, but this might mean that your intended donor resides in another part of the country. While many couples do find their perfect match within a reasonable distance, you may have to limit your search radius if you’re on the absolute strictest of budgets. While it’s less expensive to find a local donor, it doesn’t mean you have to settle for what you can find in the immediate area. This is a big decision. Go with your gut and decide upon a donor that is the right fit first, and a local choice second.
What Is This Person Like, Personality-Wise?
Physical attributes can be gleaned from a picture, and a person’s medical history will be included in their profile workup, but what about one of the most important elements – their personality? Anonymous donors answer questions regarding their personality and also write a small paragraph describing themselves in their donor profile. The responses to these questions can tell you a lot about the individual.
When you’re ready to take the first step toward in the donor selection process, contact your preferred fertility clinic right away. At Red Rock Fertility Center, we specialize in all stages of fertility, and we’re honored to be able to deliver a new generation of fertility care to our valued patients. Register now for one of our monthly seminars, or contact us directly at 702-749-4690 for more information about our leading fertility options.